Hi, first off, thank you for this bleak bundle of fun. Unfortunately, I found some typos in the prologue:
"You do not feel your knees bleeding from your trashing against the hard ground nor the countless cuts, tears, and bruises marring your body and have barely started healing." Thrashing instead of trashing?
"The void quals and shakes at the sound, trying to drown out the sound but fails." maybe squalls?
"You flinch closing your eyes from the sudden intrusion of light to your world of darkness." needs a comma -> flinch, closing
I also saw at the end that you're looking for new words for magic? Have you tried going through a dictionary for dead languages? An example could be "Aeling" which is Anglo-Saxon and translates loosely to: burning of the mind, ardour.
You can find a lot of fun, specific words that could fit your needs!
Thank you again for releasing the game! I'm greatly looking forward to reading the rest of your story!
Ahah, I'm glad it was useful! I usually skim read IFs but this was very good and just grabbed my attention. Hopefully I won't find any typos when I start chapter 1, but I'll be sure to report them if so.
Out of curiosity, do you have a language in mind yet if you do choose to follow up on that idea, or are you still considering what would fit in best? No worries if you aren't sure or decided not to do it! I'm just being nosey at this point lol
Hi, thank you again. There are probably plenty of typos, even after fixing quite a lot of them :D
I don't have a language in mind, though I do like the sentence you used, "burning of the mind". I tried a bit of googling to find if any language (first dead language, then just any language) has one word for that sentence and tried another few sentences. The results were not perfect but it is a work in progress.
Best of luck with using that phrase as I think it would be unlikely to yield useful results, although you could prove me wrong! Almost all dead language resources I know (which, granted, isn't a lot) use as direct a translation as possible and skip out the nuance of the original word. The example I gave does better translates into "burning of the mind" but its more literal and direct translation is ardour and is what will be used most frequently, hence why I used that example since you'd mentioned that word previously for magic. Considering this, maybe it would be easier to find a single word and try and expand from there? Regardless, I wish you all the best with your search and a satisfactory resolution to it!
There is a reason most Interactive Fiction here on itch contain a lot of dealing with trauma and characters reacting to it; my personal guess is that it's how we work through the memories of our own "misadventures" of life.
And you get it. You do not shy from the topic, there is no avoidance in face of terror. You do not glorify it, and yet it has sufficient impact.
And it is such a refreshing feeling. Most IF authors either do not approach such themes, or when encountered it has no impact on the story. By reading your work I noticed none of that. The story feels complete at every step, the word-weave satisfies the longing.
We take notice and appreciate. May your creation know no bounds.
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I think a word is missing here.
Save: https://gofile.io/d/R5OLtK
Bit of a story inconsistency
MC bashed their hand after waking up first time, was taken to healing bath, should be aware of baths.
Save:https://gofile.io/d/JXNgJX
Hi,
thank you! I will fix those.
Hi, first off, thank you for this bleak bundle of fun. Unfortunately, I found some typos in the prologue:
"You do not feel your knees bleeding from your trashing against the hard ground nor the countless cuts, tears, and bruises marring your body and have barely started healing." Thrashing instead of trashing?
"The void quals and shakes at the sound, trying to drown out the sound but fails." maybe squalls?
"You flinch closing your eyes from the sudden intrusion of light to your world of darkness." needs a comma -> flinch, closing
I also saw at the end that you're looking for new words for magic? Have you tried going through a dictionary for dead languages? An example could be "Aeling" which is Anglo-Saxon and translates loosely to: burning of the mind, ardour.
You can find a lot of fun, specific words that could fit your needs!
Thank you again for releasing the game! I'm greatly looking forward to reading the rest of your story!
Thank you! I will fix those for the next update :D And think about the magic, the dead languages is a brilliant idea!
Ahah, I'm glad it was useful! I usually skim read IFs but this was very good and just grabbed my attention. Hopefully I won't find any typos when I start chapter 1, but I'll be sure to report them if so.
Out of curiosity, do you have a language in mind yet if you do choose to follow up on that idea, or are you still considering what would fit in best? No worries if you aren't sure or decided not to do it! I'm just being nosey at this point lol
Hi, thank you again. There are probably plenty of typos, even after fixing quite a lot of them :D
I don't have a language in mind, though I do like the sentence you used, "burning of the mind". I tried a bit of googling to find if any language (first dead language, then just any language) has one word for that sentence and tried another few sentences. The results were not perfect but it is a work in progress.
Hi again, and a happy new year to you!
Best of luck with using that phrase as I think it would be unlikely to yield useful results, although you could prove me wrong! Almost all dead language resources I know (which, granted, isn't a lot) use as direct a translation as possible and skip out the nuance of the original word. The example I gave does better translates into "burning of the mind" but its more literal and direct translation is ardour and is what will be used most frequently, hence why I used that example since you'd mentioned that word previously for magic. Considering this, maybe it would be easier to find a single word and try and expand from there? Regardless, I wish you all the best with your search and a satisfactory resolution to it!
You get it, you understand us.
There is a reason most Interactive Fiction here on itch contain a lot of dealing with trauma and characters reacting to it; my personal guess is that it's how we work through the memories of our own "misadventures" of life.
And you get it. You do not shy from the topic, there is no avoidance in face of terror. You do not glorify it, and yet it has sufficient impact.
And it is such a refreshing feeling. Most IF authors either do not approach such themes, or when encountered it has no impact on the story. By reading your work I noticed none of that. The story feels complete at every step, the word-weave satisfies the longing.
We take notice and appreciate. May your creation know no bounds.
I, personally, would like to romance the CRAP out of Havard and raise my little MC with him. Alas….🩷
This is so amazing, very much looking forward to how it progresses!
Looking forward to seeing how the story unfolds, very impressed with the amount of content already available